So you all know what an FRS is right? Right?
[As all the FRS writers begin to arrive at the writer’s room atop the 55th floor of an undisclosed chennai high rise building…]
Lool, what chennai high-rise building? You really thought we will give away our location? Nice try.
-5: Narration, since this is a trilingual we will multiply points by 3 whenever wherever. ( you can do the mental math on this )
-10: Usual cinema overdose of gangsters, here of course they run an entire city called Waaji
Maybe their official city song is Waaji Waaji Waaji En Jeevan Sivaji, although no such thing is implied.
Also also, this movie joins the list of movies which just say people are gangsters without explaining how or what made them turn into gangsters- no explanation of the process- these are important for FRS writers, we believe in detail.
+15: The contribution of gangsters to Waaji’s economy seems immense, they have a modern city functioning with the best security systems, banks, expressways and what not; maybe someone can do a paper about the economic benefits of letting gangsters run Indian cities, we mean…legitimately.
+21: The gangster congregation is more like those “Royal Stag- Have I Made It Large” type ad set up and of course we see that the Roy family is going back to India, to take over the country etc
<Cut to Mumbai>
+88.97: Hero is here to save another gangster (yes you cannot keep count) from a housing society, he has to reach the top floor within 5 cooker whistles, going from one floor to another but every floor has a different type of monstrous thugs + wild animals he has to overcome.
Holy mackerel! That’s a full movie right there, like Raid: Redemption meets the Cabin in the Woods.
Actually this can be a full movie. Should we cut points for director not going further with this idea?
+30: Hero is neither clean shaven or bearded, this intermediate state of facial hair is possibly to satisfy the expectations of both kinds of die hard fans of our hero.
-23: Clueless Mumbai Police is clueless or like we say in the office “Mumbai Police is not going to like this film”
+65.21: Although they will be very happy to have Shraddha Kapoor as a special agent <insert appropropriate yet respectable smileys here>
+5.52: Shraddha here is a special agent because she is special to our hero <wink wink>
+17: Whenever Bombay police is going to take up a special investigation, they will first set up secret headquarters which has fun start-up office feel, it has foosball, basketball ring, beer cafe, video game parlour and of course graffiti splashed walls (obvious) and before I forget, a shooting range.
I guess this is done so that the special agents really feel special <wink wink >
Good initiative by Mumbai Police
-7.3: One person in the special unit’s only job is to pan and scan CCTV footage, we believe that such a limited role will not help in future career paths #wecare
-45: Whenever Shraddha Kapoor meets hero, there will melodious music and slow breeze that will gently animate her hair cliche.
-20: Mumbai Police still use a random method to allot cases to their policemen.
<Cuts back to Waaji City>
-51.8: Everytime we cut back to Waaji City, there is a new set of gangster families and their heads that we need to place within the context of the story, since all of them wear suits and have cheroots in their mouth this memory game became a little difficult.
The FRS team as usual were innovative to brand everyone with above characteristics as villain and we went ahead with the viewing.
-8.10: Mega Mafioso death will trigger a succession war and no one in Waaji City knows how to get hold of the wealth cliche
-18.3: Mafioso uncles will have chief economic advisor (their words not mine) but will not have proper succession plan. It’s like one legal document would have prevented this whole film
+41: Mandira Bedi is styled to look like someone from a Gautham Menon film, this we believe is a teaser for next week’s hopeful release.
-23: Indian Music director still using BWAAANG music for any major moment in the movie without realizing that even Hollywood has moved past BWAANG!
-95: Waaji, a city infested with gangsters will also have the best in class police tech in the world including jet based police vehicles.
+23: Imaginative world building: director never gives the audience the time to guess the geographical locations in the movie- one second we are in a Dubai type desert city, next second rainforest, then snowy mountains.
Buy the ticket. See the world.
+4: Hero steals time bound tech device which everyone is after and then takes vacation with heroine all over the world.
Because of course why not.
+11: Vacation is photographed in great detail for future romance things, this we believe will give a boost to a sub segment in the photography economy called “couple vacation photography”
Become a vacation photographer. See the world (with a couple). Wink Wink!
-85: That reminds us, where did the comedian Kodandam go? Missing Mumbai police is missing. #MissingInAction
+21: Hero makes punchline based on cricket so that whole of India can react to it. Masterclass.
-50: Just when you thought you didn’t understand the complexity of the storylines, character will start to recite shloka in sanskrit. #truestory
+200: Director’s noble intention to show many movies in one single movie, I think this is a uniquely telugu director school of thought.
Multiple storylines. Multiple characters. Multiple twists and turns. But singular focus on hero.
Made us question if this movie is for real or like made up?
There too director stumped us by keeping a great song in the proceedings called “unmai ethu? Poi ethu? Sollidu Anbe
( you see we didn’t do the usual “all songs whenever wherever”, wink wink )
These directors are anticipatory genius.
A simple feeling of watching at least 23 movies and TV shows for the price of a single ticket.
A humbling yet exhilarating and uniquely tiring experience.
All numbers are incidental and arbitrary, except the facts provided by our data analytics team