So you all know what an FRS is right? Right?
+1: Movie begins with Louis Armstrong singing “What A Wonderful World” in the background, we don’t know why, maybe the movie is about how great the world is, if that is the case we should probably reduce marks.
<Extracted from audio excerpts from FRS Room audio>
……. But then the first point need not be negative…..
……..Only uncles will have such sentiment..maybe we should hire more young writers into the FRS…
…Darn it you kids…
Wait, uncle, that doesn’t mean you will be fired from the FRS writing panel! Not now, we mean. …..
</Extracted from audio excerpts from FRS Room audio>
And now for some….recruitment
Key Skills
Are you cynical? (Weightage: 80%)
Can you write? (not an actual requirement, weightage 20%)
Are you funny? (not an actual requirement, weightage ***)
Do you believe in the magic of movies? (If yes, DON’T apply please save us some time)
Note
You will remain anonymous for life
You will receive no privileges
Of course this job does not pay
Thanks
-50: Movie’s name is Mafia (now you know how we hate this gangsterism) and that’s not even the scary part, it is accompanied by the words Chapter 1, which means there is more to this…this thing.
-201: Hero’s name is Aryan. But brother’s name is Dilip or something, not Dravid
Lost opportunity is lost.
<crickets chirping> <crickets chirping>
-31: Hero is a honest narcotics officer cliche
-507: Hero is a honest narcotics officer who narrates his own story cliche. We wish we could cut more for this, but too much obvious narration is obvious in this movie. Very very troubling. Makes you wonder if this movie was produced by GVM
(note: this movie was not produced by GVM)
+12: Gautham Menon type friendly and understanding father (note: movie not produced by GVM)
-3.5: Hero’s batchmates also become his teammates at the Narcotics division, but they treat him like superior and not peer; he also like that except with PBS
+5: For everytime PBS is on screen (PBS is Priya Bhavan Shankar for those who didn’t catch our point)
PBS fans unite! She has a decent role too.
-48fps: Slow motion overdose with BGM. Heroooooo’s caaaaaaaar stopppppps aaaaannd heeeeerooo gettttttsss oneeeeeeeee shoeeeeeeeeeee out
It’s actually even slower in the movie.
Accompanied by Nanananaaaa nanana…type music
–48fps*2: same thing happens for villain too (although we are tired to type like that)
Makes us wonder if the director thought that the only difference between short film and feature film is the slow motion. By the time, we were done with the movie, we hated slow motion everywhere and we started to think if we should take up running .
Note: all writers worked from their undisclosed location separately and submitted their drafts. WFH is the default for FRS, boys.
Urgh and we hate running. Imagine.
+12: Director says story and all no need, just hero needs to find villain (actually not so difficult)
–40: Movie falls into the usual trap of suave villain means should wear a coat and have wine glass and listen to some western classic music.
Usual.
Also usual slow motion for villain too. Slo-mo while going in a boat, slo-mo while getting out of a private jet.etc, the scenes write themselves (in slow motion)
“How much of build-up is too much build-up? Asked the gym trainer”
+23: Thalaivasal Vijay plays a concerned citizen activist who has made it his life’s mission to bring down drug menace types
-23: Thalaivasal Vijay lives in a big bungalow, totally unlike normal citizen activists, maybe we need to investigate further here. How did he fund his activism?
-10: Movie becomes cat and mouse for sometime and then suddenly ends, but before it suddenly ends hero and villain will do animal type comparisons to themselves etc
Hmm, they didn’t use cat and mouse analogy but.
+15: Ending might be humorous for some.
All numbers are incidental and arbitrary, except the facts provided by our data analytics team
Subam
Team FRS
The Lowly Laureate 