“Quick Gun, Make Fun”
A note on the Fawlty Rating System (FRS)
*Initially thought about in 1934, it came to fruition only in the late 2000s.
*It is the only movie rating system in the universe to be based on a Buddhist scroll that was actually written by an Irish traveller who had been an assistant director in the movie “Birth of a nation”, the scroll was curiously titled “The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari to make a Baahubali”
*The rating system is now named after the Irish Traveller, a small portion of the proceeds from this review will go to a bhel puri vendor in an undisclosed street corner for secret reasons.
*All numbers and words are arbitrary, mostly imaginary. They do not mean anything
A note on the Fawlty Rating System Ends
“Quick Gun, Make Fun”
-245: Movie begins with voice-over telling us that Madurai is not about violence, extortion but a lot of fun. Shows villain as extortionist, previous violence is heavily stressed, climax fight will make Roman warriors cry out in shyness
-32: Hero is a wastrel.
-12: He is proud about it, hence a hero. Also has friend who does the same.(soori playing soori)
+90: Title font is good. authentic.
-10: Real life sports be banned, heroes will always win no matter what their competency is, even if the movie is out and out about a non performing hero, still he will hit the pot at the top of the school culturals, so that flowers fall on his head (cut to title song “Rajni Murugan! Gun !Gun!)
-1500: Hero dresses himself as John Wayne, movie is not a western.
-12.5: If there is a grandfather, hero is the only guy compassionate towards him. Rest of the relatives (some 1200 people living in 244 countries) does not care for the old man.
-2: Hero’s father is a simple school headmaster cliche
-100: Heroine does not say “Yes”to hero immediately, so that we can spend rest of one hour in wooing tactics
-12: When heroine says ” I dont like him”, means she likes him, extra minus points for gullible father who believes in them
-67: For all the movies that employ the above tactic
+345: Heroine falls for hero when he puts tea stall opposite her house, yeah just because he tried, so easy, come on guys. This is the best way to get girl!
-10: Tea shop does not register profits, no proper inventory also (MBA shizz talking)
-08.56: Villain will be successful in his attempts with others, same technique will fail with hero, just because he is hero.
+77.9: One whole RajKiran sequence which is genuinely funny.
-58.9: Number of bad jokes more than number of good ones
-63: Whatever happens, hero will get girl (minus one more if you didn’t know that already)
+45.6: An assassin who should actually be working in PETA or Jallikattu prevention force, because he fears for the life of a dog when he is going to kill 25 people. Environmental token positive points.
-160: SivaK movies getting self referential already, boss his filmography itself is not even half a page, also all songs look like some song in his previous film, same what’s the word..ah..mileu.
“Family is core, dont abandon them and all that ok?”
That’s all.
The Lowly Laureate 